How Older, White Men Can Find Their Place in Today’s Evolving Workplace
Today’s workplace is changing in ways that can be bewildering to men like me.
We white men in our 50s, 60s and 70s came of age in workplaces where people didn’t declare their pronouns. Where work, personal life and politics were very separate spheres. Where the boss knew best. Where there was little attention to questions of privilege and equity.
I happen to think that today’s flatter, fairness-focused workplace is an improvement over older cultures.
Whether or not you agree with me, it is clear the workplace has evolved–and will continue to do so. This poses changes to older white men like us to find our place.
The good news is we can. In the emerging workplace, everyone can belong. And there’s a real opportunity for guys like us to thrive in ways scarcely possible in decades past.
Here are three keys for older white men to find their place in today’s evolving workplace:
First: Build Self-Awareness
It’s time for us older white guys to look in the mirror. In workplaces defined more and more by networks, distributed power and a focus on equity, we need to start noticing things we didn’t typically notice before. Such as the advantages we had growing up. As white people in a society that has systematically disadvantaged people of color. As men in a society that has historically treated women as second-class citizens.
Becoming aware of our privilege doesn’t mean losing sight of the work we’ve done to get where we are. It does mean acknowledging that others have had to work harder to reach the same place.
Building self-awareness extends to the rules we grew up with about what it means to be a real man. Rules like having to be dominant, king of the hill. Like having to hold in our feelings. Like having to do it all ourselves. Like demeaning women and homosexuality. This “confined” version of masculinity turns out to be outdated and unhealthy–to ourselves and those around us.
Second: Build Awareness of Others
It’s also vital for us older white men to learn more about others around us. For starters, reach out and start building relationships with people at work who are different from you. Maybe they are women, people of color, non-binary folks.
Abraham Lincoln once said, “I do not like that person. I must get to know them better.” Once you have built a relationship with someone, it’s hard for resentments or fears to take hold. And it’s easier to work together effectively.
It’s also our responsibility to educate ourselves about the challenges of folks from different backgrounds. Take it on yourself to learn about racism, about sexism and other forms of inequality. Do so without burdening your friends who are women and people of color. Read books. Listen to podcasts. Watch movies directed by people from underrepresented groups.
Third: Redefine Success
If you take the first two steps mentioned above, this third step will come naturally. We need to redefine success at work and beyond. Traditionally, our goal as professional men has been to get to the top of an ever-narrower ladder. To become king of the corporate hill.
Success has been about “me.” About beating others in the rat race.
It has been fundamentally exclusive.
We need to change that in the emerging workplace. We need to embrace a fundamentally “inclusive” version of success. Where our goal is about “me and we.” Where we’re about service, not selfishness. Where we’re about helping others advance even as we progress.
Conclusion
There’s a wonderful payoff for going on this journey.
When we develop a fuller recognition of ourselves, when we learn more about others, and revise our definition of success to be about service, we can find ourselves deeply fulfilled.
We discover not only that we belong in today’s evolving workplace, but that we can thrive. Our work becomes more meaningful. Purposeful. Even soulful.
